Dear Dreamer: Please Stop Explaining Yourself
Clarity doesn't come from convincing, it comes from embodiment.
I’m done. I finally said ‘Enough’
Finally, the amount it wore on me had become evident and how exhausting it was became evident, even on my skin.
When your dream lives within you, it radiates from you. But sharing it with the wrong people, it leaks. And suddenly, your radiance is dimmed. Your excitement faded.
This was me, for so long…
Dedicated to proving to others why my dreams matter.
Until one day, I had enough.
When I learned that over-explaining is a trauma response, I was mind-blown, but also not surprised. No wonder I was so exhausted.
I still can’t figure out where this came from. My need to explain myself, prove myself worthy, and convince the closest people in my life why I needed to create, be, do, and have the things I wanted.
I remember subtly being a dreamer, all my life. I loved to imagine. I especially loved to imagine myself on stage or on set, dancing as the main character of a show or music everyone loved. I enthusiastically re-created what I saw in my mind as a play or performance for my family and friends.
Sometimes alone in my room.
Maybe I got scowls and chuckles that I chose to forget or ignore, but that still live in my body. But somewhere along the way, I started explaining myself to people who couldn’t see me, hear me, and therefore, understand me.
Here’s what I am finally figuring out, though:
Explaining is a trauma response.
And embodiment is the reclaimation.
We do it because we want to be seen clearly. You want to be loved for who you really are. All our life, we felt like we weren’t seen or understoof. We felt like love was transactional.
We’re tired of being misunderstood.
But here’s what I learned after exhausting myself clawing to the center of the circle, waving my hands erratically, and begging for validation:
It’s okay to be misunderstood. In fact, it’s your power.
Because if you’re meant to create something the world has never seen before… you’ll have to use your imagination first.
No one can see your imagination.
Your dreams live within you, no one else.
You don’t even have to see them clearly yet. You just have to know they are in you and they breathe with you, and they give you life.
Let people misunderstand you.
Your power was never meant to be packaged. And the closer you keep it, the less others have control over you.
Stop begging to be seen.
You are the proof. You are the prayer. You are the point.
Again, I’ll go back to a very sacred teaching that I learned through yogic philosophy. This ideal continues to prove itself in my life over and over again:
The ancient yogis believed that we were only given a certain number of breaths in this life. When we use it up, life ends. This is why they are keen on breathwork. Holding the breath, pausing between breaths, being conscious of the breath.
It’s why I am keen on breathwork too. And it’s why now, I see how overexplaining is simply a waste of my breath… an unproductive use of my life force energy.
Every “just so you know…”
Every “what I meant was…”
Every “I hope this makes sense…”
Leaks energy from your body like a slow spiritual drip, and gives that energy to something outside of you. Something you cannot control.
Your breath is your power. Protect it like you protect your life because breath is life.
Your nervous system is begging for sovereignty, not strategy.
Because the need to explain yourself is the last breath of your old identity gasping for air, begging to stay.
Let her go.
She can’t hold the dream.
You don’t owe anyone an essay on your evolution.
Your next level doesn’t require a press release. It only requires your presence.
Your NO doesn’t need to be a paragraph. It can be clear, and it can strike like lightning. Like medicine.
No ladies, we don’t need to be the loudest person in the room. We need to be quiet, observant and in our power.
That makes us unstoppable, unapologetic and unpredicatble.
Allow your “yes” to be a full-body YES!
Let your “no” be sacred fire.
Let your presence be the only explanation.
Your dream is calling you forward, not in logic…
But in frequency.
The Somatic YES
🔥 Reclaim your Somatic YES!
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This month’s theme is:
“The Somatic YES” Reclaiming Your Full-Body Truth
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